Family Service Assn. Gone but Problems It Helped Solve Remain

Since the 1950s, the Family Service Assn. of Orange County had been a nonprofit, private counseling agency providing a place where people could receive low-cost help to repair broken relationships and strengthen their families. How ironic and sad, in this era of family values, that the agency closed its doors at the end of last year due to lack of financial support.

Although health insurance and managed-care companies pay for counseling, many working people, as well as the unemployed, lack mental health benefits. Charitable institutions prefer to spend their limited resources on more fashionable programs, such as the treatment of drug and child abuse. Caring for clients who contributed a mere $10 per session, the agency could no longer afford to pay rent and a professional staff.

In the 28 years I worked as a licensed clinical social worker for the association, I saw many people’s lives improve.

A young wife who came from an abusive and alcoholic home incorporated her fears into her own child-raising style. Although her husband did not drink, she equated his anger over normal household difficulties with her father’s alcoholic rages. She taught her children to distrust their father and run to her with their problems. The husband, often ignored and forgotten in his parents’ large family, felt anxious when his wife and children left him out of their lives. By discussing these problems, we reduced their fears. The couple learned to understand and trust each other.

Another wife who worried about money all the time nagged her husband. He, on the other hand, turned his paycheck over to her and did not want to discuss how she spent their income. Once they each understood the other’s expectations, they got along better.

A sullen teenage boy, sent to me by his parents, talked to me twice and quit coming. A year later, he reappeared and wanted to deal with the problems in his life. Although he later developed other troubles, he had learned some therapeutic tools to solve these difficulties when they arose.

Another young man, just out of prison, wanted help understanding and controlling his anger. He came from a violent family and believed violence was the only way to solve problems. When he learned other methods, he was able to marry and lead a normal life.

Although social workers are trained not to show their emotions, at least two cases affected me deeply.

The husband of a young woman dying of a brain tumor buried himself in his work. Frightened, he couldn’t talk to her about his feelings. At their last visit, they seemed much closer and more able to face the future, but still I cried.

A beautiful and bright young woman who had suffered both physical and mental abuse from her family one day concluded she couldn’t manage life any more. She died by her own hand. Once again I cried.

On other days, my work brought me joy. At Christmastime, one young man whose family received public assistance started a drive at his continuation high school to raise money for poor families served by the agency. Since he had been helped, he wanted to help others.

In my last few days at the agency, I struggled to explain to clients and students why the agency was closing, and I sought out other agencies that would take over their care and training.

I wondered what would happen to Jane, who is unable to handle the stress of work. What would happen to the single mother who needs help in learning how to parent her children as well as how to choose healthy friendships? Would the young working woman struggling with flashbacks from childhood abuse be able to resolve the conflicts in her life?

When Family Service Assn. started, it had offices in several cities in Orange County, all staffed with licensed clinical social workers. At weekly meetings, a psychiatrist was available for consultation on difficult cases.

However, over time, the agency developed its own problems. Administrators struggled with fund-raising, grant writing, public relations, community awareness and board development. Some administrators lacked either the skill, or perhaps, the desire to develop the programs which would meet immediate community needs. They neglected to explain the importance of the agency’s work to the public or write timely grant proposals.

Success stories about families do not make headlines. The work that is done to help the little guy is not recognized for its intrinsic value. For almost four decades, the agency went quietly about its business of teaching families how to lead better lives and raise their children to become strong citizens. Thousands of people became healthy members of our society because they talked to a counselor at Family Service Assn.

Occasionally I run into an old client who asks, “Remember when?” The question remains: Where is the safety net for those who cannot afford mental health care?